The second agreement in The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz, is becoming a significant mainstay in my life. The basic idea of this agreement is Don’t Take Anything Personally. I’m feeling compelled to write about this tonight; mainly because the work involved in this agreement has recently become a much steeper hill to navigate.
Domestication. This is the core of why people take situations or words personally. We know how things should be, don’t we? We know the way. Those that don’t see things the way we do are not educated, right? Sometimes, they are just plain stupid, right? Wrong.
The moment we think we know better than anyone else is the moment we lose power. I understand this is paradoxical in our culture but, even considering that — it’s low energy production to assume we know better than others. (Plus, if you’re a regular reader to this blog, you know how much value I give to cultural beliefs) When we assume these things, we feel the need to defend ourselves…because we are right, and we know it! So, we must prove it. Enter conflict.
I’ve just spent the last 10 minutes thinking about social media. There is an aspect to social media that stimulates the human desire to take people and situations personally. One that is blindingly obvious are the memes that pop up in the news feed. There are many of these memes that people share as if to say,” I agree with this and this is how I feel.” I came across one of these memes a few months ago that proudly stated, “If you mess with me too many times, my inner crazy will come out and stab you in the neck.”
Funny, right? I do see the sarcasm in this, I promise. On a deeper level, I understand sarcasm is the truth, with a bit of a stretch. People look for these things. Conflict is their fuel. They would never agree to this. They would say I am crazy, right? Maybe I am crazy. I must ask though, what other explanation is there if you’re continuously caught up in meaningless conflict with other humans? This is interesting because the people who thrive on conflict and hardships are the ones that share these memes. They are the exception.
I mention this is to illustrate a point. The “Look at me…look at me” frame of mind many people have embraced is pure poison. It creates a shield for that specific unit of consciousness. It desires to feel separate from the masses. It is not necessary and creates a false sense of satisfaction. The desire to be desired by others or the desire to remain still and never create waves. These are tools of the ego. The ego isn’t interested in a spiritual journey. It’s interested in this physical, external acceptance journey.
There are many things about the people in my life that used to make me crazy. Often they still do but I’ve learned to accept it without an emotional reaction. A deep emotional reaction — the kind that create. It takes work and deliberate consistency in being aware of yourself. They are viewing this reality through a different lens…with different beliefs, different experiences, a different domesticated understanding of what is right or wrong, high or low, or near and far — We are all relatively the same but extraordinarily different at the same time. We must learn to accept this.
For example — I asked for help writing my eBook. I had a preconceived idea on who would volunteer to help. Only half of those people volunteered. Was I upset? Not at all. There are many reasons the others didn’t, I am sure. But, number 1 reason is — the world isn’t about me. My preconceived ideas are spawned from my beliefs on what should have happened. If it doesn’t happen, it’s okay. The wisdom knows more than I do. I don’t have that type of cosmic knowledge…at least not in this human disguise I am wearing. This isn’t how life works. I understand this. I accept this. I love all of my friends equally.
My place in this world is taking shape. I am not afraid of anything. Nothing is bigger than I am because I am everything. The limiting aspects of the ego are standing in gasoline while I hold a lit match.
Don’t take anything personally. We are all one thing. One energy. We are a casserole of energy, consciousness, and wavelengths that come in many formations.
You know this is true. You can feel it right now. Cool, right?
Enjoy the ride.
As always, thanks for reading
Much love, my friends